At times, we get so busy with our work and personal lives that we never leave time to relax. Sometimes, we just need to get a little bit of humor to improve our moods. So OnTheClock is a time clock system, so I thought, why not post a list of simple one-liner jokes about time and clocks on our blog. Admittedly, these riddles may be a little corny, but if they put a smile on your face or at least get a snicker out of you, it's worthwhile. If you're in a need of a time clock solution, you may want to check out OnTheClock when you have the time.
So here they are.
What do you call a tense clock?
All wound up.
What did the robber say to the clock?
Hands up!
Why is everyone so tired on April 1st?
They just finished a March of 31 days.
Why did the tardy man stop to purchase a clock?
He wanted to buy time.
Where did the clock finish the race?
Wherever it wound up.
Why did the girl sit on her watch?
She wanted to be on time.
Why shouldn’t you tell secrets when a clock is around?
Because time will tell.
Why did the man throw the clock out the window?
He wanted to see time fly.
What animal keeps the best time?
A watchdog!
How many months have 28 days?
All of them.
Why did the pendulum stop moving?
It lost its swing.
What happens if you annoy a clock?
It gets ticked off.
Why did the woman put a clock under her desk?
She wanted to work overtime.
What do you call a grandfather clock?
An old timer.
If your watch is broken, why can’t you go fishing?
Because you don’t have the time.
What does a wall clock do after it stops ticking?
It hangs around.
Why did the historian measure a clock?
To know the beginning and end of time.
Why did the man buy so many clocks?
Because time is money.
What do you call a story that one clock tells to another?
Second-hand information.
Why did the clock get sent to the principal’s office?
It was tocking too much.
What do you call a clock on the moon?
A lunartick.
What did the second hand say to the hour hand?
See you again in a minute.
What did the unwound clock say to its owner?
It’s about time.
What kinds of bugs live in a clock?
Ticks.
What time does a duck wake up?
At the quack of dawn.
What did the street clock say to the tower clock?
High there!
What do you get when you cross a clock and a chicken?
A cluck.
How can you tell if a clock is hungry?
It goes back four seconds.
I did not create any of these one-liners. I have heard these jokes over the years from family, friends, kids, and comedians. I do not know the origins or who actually came up with these, but kudos to the individuals who have the ability to think these up. I hope you enjoyed this comedic break!
